Complex Trauma Therapist: Your Complexity Honored

I helped people with complex trauma, as a complex trauma therapist I have to go beyond being "trauma informed" because not all trauma is created equally. 

Trauma care, and those techniques used to treat trauma were designed, and are almost always tested, with PTSD. Why does that matter? Because complex post traumatic stress disorder (cPTSD) is not the same as PTSD and while the treatment of PTSD and cPTSD use the same set of tools that is where the differences become important. [source]

Complex trauma is almost always the result of ongoing and repeated childhood trauma. That matters because our PTSD research has historically been based on combat veterans, adults who often had fairly normal childhoods and even young adult lives until combat created the conditions that resulted in PTSD. When you grew up with your needs generally well met you come to trauma treatment with a host of resources that children who suffered ongoing trauma (abuse and/or neglect) simply don't have. And that matters, a complex trauma therapist understands that difference.

Complex trauma therapist yellow rose with snow

The Roots of Complex Trauma

  • Complex trauma occurs most commonly in adults whose childhoods were unsafe. Whether that meant sexual, physical, emotional, or mental abuse, or the repeated neglect of your needs.
  • Complex trauma is at its root a relational trauma: those you were meant to rely on and trust were not safe and that changes everything from your brain structure to your ability to be in relationship with others.
  • Children blame themselves when their caregivers are not safe and do not meet their needs because that is safer than acknowledging the truth.
  • What happened to you as a child was not your fault, but you likely often still feel guilt, shame, and fear there is something wrong with you.
  • Living this way was never sustainable, but it has ceased to be bearable. And this is when you are ready for a complex trauma therapist.

How I Work as a Complex Trauma Therapist

  • First: we concentrate on relationship. Complex trauma is at its root about relationships that were not what you needed as a child. So our first and most important focus is building a safe supportive therapeutic relationship.
  • We work slowly, ensuring that your nervous system can stay regulated and not experience re-traumitization.
  • Together we teach your nervous system how to trust again, and to experience a supportive relationship with healthy boundaries and predicable support.
  • You learn to care for your needs, to accept help, and to begin to understand what was never your fault.
  • As appropriate we build skills, you will learn to regulate your nervous system (something that normally happens naturally in safe relationship with caregivers, but cannot happen in abuse and neglect), and as appropriate we bring in trauma processing including EMDR.
Complex trauma therapist rose hips and snow

My invitation...

It can be hard to believe that life can be different, but I have seen myself the difference even early healing provides for those with complex PTSD. 

Those with complex PTSD have often been taught that their needs don't matter, that their asks are selfish, and that no one is going to help them.

Those messages aren't true. Together we can tell a new story.

You've got questions, I have answers: click here

I'm Ready

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If you've ever asked: "how do I heal when I feel unworthy of anything?" or "how can I start this journey when it seems so impossible?" you are in the right place. Your needs are not selfish, but the hurt is real, the wounds are deep, and the messages of your youth are slow to change. But this time, you don't have to do it by alone, you are worthy of healing.

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What To Expect from a Complex Trauma Therapist Like Me

Complex trauma therapist yellow rose sugar dusted with frost

First things first: treating complex trauma is not the same as treating single incident trauma. A complex trauma therapist goes beyond "trauma informed," and must center the unique experience of those with complex trauma. [source]

At the beginning of our work together we will examine your current experiences. What do you struggle with in your life today? This is key information for us to understand the way complex trauma impacts your life. As we spend time in this realm we will focus on building a safe and secure therapeutic relationship. For many clients this is the first time they have experienced healthy relationship structures, boundaries, and opportunities. In this phase we also do what is called "stabilization," building skills that help you take charge of your experience and begin to show your nervous system what safety can feel like.

As we create safety within the therapeutic frame we begin to explore the myths of your life, what are the underlying beliefs you hold about yourself that just aren't true but that trauma has make feel all too true. In this phase, as it is accessible and safe we reprocess traumatic material (note I do not say traumatic memories, because for many with cPTSD there are huge gaps in memory, and an overwhelming experience of trauma.

Along the way we focus on relearning relating in the therapeutic relationship, and create empowerment for new and healthier ways of being.

We discover the marvelous, magical, and powerful being you truly are. Together we reclaim your voice and joy one piece at a time.

I'm Ready